If I lay here

One of my favorite most TV drama shows had one of my favorite most episode, and I'm sure a lot of people would agree to the same.The show in itself, being a legend in the medium of silver screen, and has rendered itself to various sorts of critical acclaims post the premiering of this episode.

Which show am I talking about? Grey's Anatomy. And episode? The Season 2: Finale. The whole show seemed to be so complete with this particular episode. It just seemed like it all came together. The feeling of betrayal, anger, hurt, pain, hatred, love, lust, and above them all ... forgiveness. The true constituents of drama, in one show, in one tightly packed one-hour long run, and it all came down to ONE song, ONE end. Chasing Cars (Snow Patrol).

I firmly believe that, Chasing Cars owes its following and popularity to this particular feature, but the theory isn't one way, it works the other way around also. The finale could've been just one long episode with tears and longing and theatrical end, but would miss out on the most important part, an impact. So loud, so vibrant, that it would set the benchmark for the following seasons to come (which to a large extent, Grey's Anatomy failed to deliver) and for other shows to follow. Nonetheless, Grey's Anatomy Season 2 delivered and it shall remain pristine in that paramount structure of its own!

But this article, is not necessarily just about the show. It's a very personal entry. I mean of course, the song triggered the whole episode I had watched back in I believe 2005 or '06, but also how this song came about as a factor for so many things in life. My life. I have grown up listening to this song, and have somehow always managed to find myself lost in this particular limbo, which fascinates me beyond imagination. It reminds me of so many things, lessons, and most importantly of my life. So further on in this particular article, I shall touch upon both the serial and the personal impact of this particular episode.

So how does this function, well season two was full of insane drama, that honestly was quite grasping. It had various storyline running in the same plot, and the beauty of the finale (and technically the purpose also) was that it all came together in the end, the connected all the dots, and finished on that high volatile, emotionally charged note. You had the whole Addison-Derek-Meredith triangle going on, and it kept on getting more and more complex till the last episode where all the decisions are made, and then you had Izzie and Alex's relationship which would've turned out in this particular way (particularly positive) but then the whole Danny plot came in, and I think that was the catalyst of the whole season finale. And the Preston-Christina relationship also took quite turns. But as noted earlier, the last 3 minutes of the episode, when the ball is taking place, it all comes down. That my friends, is the time when the whole "Chasing Cars" starts playing. The remote background music of the strumming of the guitar, along with the drama packed ending is at it's best, and finishes at a very emotionally charged note of Danny's death, and which leaves Izzie scarred, and any fan could feel her pain, because all of us have been through that, that moment, when you're not okay with how it happened, when it's not fair, but it happens anyway.


How I connect to this episode, and especially this song specifically is as follows. For one, Grey's Anatomy has always been one of my favorite most drama shows to be telecasted. Not just because of it's drama, but the storyline, and the format, and character development, etc. I have sang this song to many people, I really like this song, but mostly because, of all the people I have sang this to, it includes one very special person, for reasons that can never end. This song also works into a very intricate storyline in my life, as it almost depicts this particular situation I have seen up close. 

I always found this sort of a meaning in this song to be honest, something that I could relate to at different times in my own life, some cryptic message that I always read through. This decrypting might not be up the best of it's standards, and to be honest is very personalized, and probably will be biased, for I tried to look for the meaning that fitted me best and the dynamics of the old meanings that I had always figured from this. It's rather a mixture of time and space. I believe, I chose to decipher this in this particular context because it suited my needs and reasons the best, hence anyone who begs to differ can do so, it's just the way I saw it.

To me, this song talks about this, painful, rather strong relationship between two people who try very hard to make it work, and they know they belong with each other, but just now now. The couple concerned here are trying so hard to figure out what to do, both of them giving each other direction towards that perfection, but being exhausted by the strength it takes ("I need your grace, to remind me, to find my own"). It's about that couple who know what they have, but still can't get it. It's not there yet, that failure which doesn't amount to a loss, yet in itself is a reason to count for pain of longing, it's about not having what you need ("Those three words, are said too much, but not enough"). The lack of comprehension of though is also clearly defined in this song. It talks of that stage in that relationship, where want is there, but lack of will is also evident. When nothing can quite justify or clear out rhyme and reason behind the plan of action. Even though it's quite vivid in it's nature in the singers head, but the singer knows that despite it being so clear, the articulation of the though lacks comprehension and structuring, that it is not to be understood by the others, to which the singer accepts the singers fault, and goes on to state the inner-most best way to explain his feelings ("I don't quite know, how to say, how I feel").
 
The chorus in it's dynamic most structure, in regards to the tune, the melody, the lyrics, never fails to amuse me. I always refer that the person who's singing this song is begging the other person to stay, to not leave, to state that it's not over. It's dysfunctional, but it's how it is. Where everyone will tell the other person otherwise, about what is to be done, what is the norm, but the person singing the song just is begging for that understanding the share to be evoked. For the other person to understand, that they're not the only one in pain, they are too! That plead can be clearly understood from these lines ("If I lay here, If I just lay here, Would you lie with me, and just forget the world?). The second chorus sees the addition of these lines which support the earlier and pleads for that comfort before all is lost, that dysfunctionality to work, before all that can be done is broken ("Forget what we're told, before we get too old, and show me a garden that's bursting into life").

And with this, I bid adieu on this entry, hope you all read it, and liked it, and if you please, do leave your valuable comments in regards to the writing, or content, or your own take on this. Constructive criticism is always welcomed.


Regards,

Nirjhar Bhattacharya