Epilogue

Here I sit, No stranger to this hour

With a mind so unrestful,
With provocative thoughts in my head,

Many of which, deals with reality of life.

As I sit through this ever so friendly hour,

I ponder, what could've been. Do I wish to know?
Every part of me knows it can't be figured,

Nor do I wish to know. But what if?

As I move past the reluctances of yesterday,

I stumble upon tomorrow.

How it eagerly awaits my entrance.
How I wish I could delay it.
And yet I know, all I want is, is her.

In her rawest form, with all her prerogatives

I want her, I want tomorrow.

It tells me of the confusion, the hardship that lays

It tells me of the fruit that it'll bore if it pays

And here I sit, procrastinating,

And judging, as I choose my steps carefully.

Moments pass, when I realize that what I miss

Is the thrill of serendipity, the nature of stupidity.

As I sit here, waiting for the dawning of tomorrow

I eagerly await the path of self discovery

That stands at my door, striving towards me

To which I run in these barren land.

I have nothing to hold me back

But my own fear of failure.

But today even that won't suffice,

For I have made up my mind.

I have chosen to be different.

I have chosen to be me.

I choose to be strong, and thus I am.

I choose to be naive, and thus I am.

I choose to be weak, and thus I am.

You choose to befool me, and here I am.

Gullible, and masochistic in my taste.

In that state of conscience, that I know who I am

And yet, surrender to your wrongdoings, I stand.

I can't learn from the insanity that you provide

Because in you is all the warmth that I find.

I wish to stop my slipping tongue,

But in the inebriation of your touch, I melt.

The thoughts that shoot through my mind

Speak of the only times that I remember.

I have been there a lot of times before,

Some worth a mention

Others choose not to mention themselves.

I have been there before, I will again

And yet the only wine to my thirst is your reminiscence.

The only hope to my box, is your smile

And the only guilt to my pleasure is your touch.

In that delight of mine, where you're perfect

Nothing can touch you. Nothing can harm.

You perish with time, but your memories shall stay

For the immortality my senses wish to know.

I have hurt you in times of need, crushed you,

Hurt you, and broken into many a piece.

But you retaliated with equal eager,

And this relationship of ours is what makes us sweeter.

In good health or bad taste, we stand together.

If you choose to be alone to day,

Then we're together in our solitude.

I bid you my farewell, with the sensuous touch

May you wake up tomorrow, in that picture that I have of you in my head.

May you wake up, with that smile that outshines tomorrows sun over head.

May you shine.

Bits & pieces of yesterday we'll have tomorrow.

It's forty minutes past twelve. Not much to do at this time, else than sleeping, until and unless of course you're being a retard like me and posting things up here, without much of any readers.! I remember this particular Graduation Speech that really moved me. "THE TWILIGHT SAGE: ECLIPSE"'s speech by Jessica. It's by far one of THE most influential speech of all time. Considering i'm a senior myself, and there aint much of anytime left for us to graduate. I really don't know how to really handle it all.

It seems like just yesterday that i had joined this school. Middle school seemed so scary. Coming from a different background, not being able to speak in Hindi, the most valuable asset found in India, really messed up a lot of things. But all that seems, just yesterday. Today, I'm a senior, who's on his way to finish this HUGE chapter of the Fat Arse book "Life" and is about to go to the next one. 

When i look back at this though, so many memories come back. It's hard to tell which is the bad one and which is the good one, cause, standing here and looking back, it ALL seems so worth it.All those fights. No i really mean fights not those bitchy 'lil kiss-and-make-up-stories . . . i quite mean the part where you don't want to see each other's face so bad, that you'd "ACTUALLY" skip school just so that you don't see it. And yet end up going and mess around with them. And all of those . . . deciding who's who, which girl is out of bound, which girl is not worth any bounds, and stepping all over that line of bound to see what if the out-of-bound works out. Standing in front of the canteen (and may i remind you, not a cafeteria, but canteen) and asking for "TEN RUPEES" knowing you have more that One Thousand Rupees in you wallet. Finding that one friend, who you can always bully, with them knowing you'd never harm them. And Finding that one friend who you'd ALWAYS want to hurt, but won't because you love them.

Being a Senior is quite amazing. Because, right now . . . Is the time we all want to make all of the mistakes and want somebody else to correct it for us. But when they do we want to tell them, "Back off, it's my life, and i know my highway directions pretty good". Even funnier, we know we're still screwing up. But this is the most innocent and bold time to fall, crumble, and to get back up. 'Cause this is the time, when mistakes aren't just mistakes, it's a lesson. 

One aspect of being senior that NEVER fails to show it's importance is THE Love. See you can always fall in love up above or down below of the "SENIOR" tag, but quite NOTHING like the High School Love.Quite nothing like loving someone now, and knowing it will last forever. Maybe it wont, but trust me it always leaves a very pleasant memory. Plus the statistic shows, most of the couple that end up being together forever, start here. Right now we're so up on our hormones, that nothing seems wrong, all the wrongs can be corrected, and all that needs to be wronged can be ignored. Who you love now, will always leave an impression in you life and how you shape it. Love now, and live forever. 

Good Memories, aren't they? But sadly, Memories, which means separation is on it's way. Sucks To say it, but in few more months, we will all move on. Some will stay connected, some will try to, others like most of us will move on. And it sucks the most when that happens. But it IS something that will. Down the line, we won't remember each other's face, name, number and we wouldn't care. That will be the time we'll look back and smile at these memories and say, oh that girl, yeah she rejected me, that was funny. Or oh yeah that guy, i screwed his case, and i slapped him, that was funny. Trust me that guy will also laugh about getting slapped.

So as of now, live these last few days as much as you can. Cause they won't last forever. Make these bitter-sweet memories. Make life. Cause someday, this will all be  gone. No more secretly meeting up your girlfriend, and not telling your parent your grades, and no more hiding behind an excuse and expect everything to turn up right. Don't wait for it to happen, let it. :)

TO ALL THOSE WHO READ THIS. 

THANK YOU.

TO ALL THOSE WHO WILL. COMMENT XD